Masomeh Hosseini

full interview

Can you introduce yourself first?
I am Masomeh Hosseini, 27 years old. Born in Iran.

What kind of house do you live in now?
The house we live in has been given to us by an organization.

What is the condition of the house? Can you explain?
The conditions of the house in which we live are such that there are five of us, each of whom has only one room.

You mean, like, each one of you has his own room?
No, it means I have a room with my husband. And the rest, yes. They have separate rooms for themselves.

How do you spend your time? Do you go to work?
No, I don’t. I spend all my time studying. Designing.

About designing. Are you a fashion designer?
Yes. I am a fashion designer. I haven’t done anything here yet. I was a fashion designer in Iran.

What makes you happy?
The answer to this question is a difficult one for me. What makes me happy… and enjoy… Just to wake up and see another day, that in itself makes me happy. We may have suffered a lot, but it makes good sense. The air.

How has your life been since you arrived in Europe? What were the hardships for you and what were the good things for you?
We had a hard time here. Especially when we had recently got here it was really hard, we never thought it would be like this. When we arrived, it was unbelievable that we were going to live here for a long time or for a while. In such a place. No house, nothing. We just have to live in a tent. Nothing. No water, no sanitation facilities. It was very hard. I did not think at all. And for goodness’ sake, I have more freedom here. I’m safe. I feel that I can do whatever I want in a better way here. I do not think anything can stand in my way.

How does life here make you feel?
Your life is hard here. Because my family is not with me, this is very difficult. That you have to be separated from those you love very much, and sometimes loneliness puts a lot of pressure on you. But, I keep thinking about the dream I had, why I came – what did I come here to do, and it strengthens my heart.

How did you manage to cope with the moment you left your family? How did you feel?
(Cries) Very hard to say. It is impossible to describe. I do not think anyone can understand this unless they can experience it.

Have you ever imagined that you would be able to put yourself in this difficult situation, control it and overcome it?
No, I never thought about it in such a difficult situation. I thought I was strong; but not so much, because the situation is really very difficult, living like this. You, who have always been with your family, suddenly come to another country where you have no acquaintance. And start a life from a basic level. Without anything.

Do you think that the difficulties you faced and struggled with have caused your skills and strengths to improve?
Of course it has had effects. Maybe I used to be weak in some ways that I no longer am. Maybe now I am much stronger than before. Maybe many other hardships of life do not put as much pressure on me.

How has Covid-19 affected your daily life and emotions?
Covid-19, which I think has disrupted the whole world, and has had a major impact on us immigrants. That I really came here to study, and to progress further, I came to pursue my dreams. But this Covid-19 has made it impossible until now for me to go to school or study what I wanted.

Now I want to ask a question about the past. Why did you have to leave your country? Can you explain?
I did not see my country of origin, Afghanistan. My parents immigrated to Iran, because of the war. I was born in Iran. And I emigrated from Iran because I really did not have an identity there. They did not value me. They did not value a human being.

How did you feel then? That you were in Iran and you had to do this?
Sometimes I felt good, more frequently I felt inferior. Although there I was a woman who had my own job. But I still could see how a bunch of people were humiliating us with their words.

How was your trip to Europe? Can you explain what happened along the way or now if you share your experiences?
On the way, it was very difficult for everyone. The same for us. It was a very difficult path. From Iran to Turkey, when we all wanted to ride in a small car, forty people, it was very difficult for me. Or that I had to sleep on the street for a week. We had never experienced this before. It was a very difficult and new experience. That they were on the street like that for weeks without anything. It was very hard. And the route from Turkey to Greece was very difficult, that is, the route that we took was a difficult one. Maybe it has been the same for everyone. I mean, I didn’t think I would survive. Our journey was so difficult.

How did you feel then? How did you feel the most?
I felt regretful. I do not know if other people have it or not. But I felt very much that I had left my family, I had left everything behind; I came here, how hard it was for me. Loneliness; that feeling of fear, what can I do now without my family. Can I do anything here at all? Can I support myself here?

Do you think about those things often?
Very. I do not think I can ever forget them.

When? Or what makes you think of them?
Whenever I have peace of mind or am comfortable, it makes me think again about all the circumstances in which I lived. What conditions did I go through? What difficult situations. And now I have comfort. And I can only thank my God.

How has the situation you faced affected your life today?
For sure, it made me feel stronger. Maybe it was too hard for me. But it made me stronger. And it made me more able to pursue my goal.

Did you ever think that you would be in such a situation and be able to control and manage it?
No! I did not think so.

How did you cope with it? How could you forget these bitter memories?
It was very hard. You can’t say I have forgotten them. But I told myself I had to be strong, so I started meditating. Talking to a therapist. I did this so that I could tolerate it a bit. You know; It cannot be forgotten. I can only bear it.

Did you find a place that could help in this regard?
An organization that only gave me a therapist, (actually) a psychiatrist, a psychiatrist, helped me a lot. It helped me a lot. It made me able to find and understand many things in myself.

What was your dream for the future before these things happened and you had to leave your home? You can start by saying, “This was my dream.”
My dream was to become a very, very big fashion designer.

What was your dream when you had to leave your home, when you started your journey?
When I started my journey, it seemed like nothing was on my mind except being away from your family. It is as if when they are, you can strive for your dreams with all your might and always say that there is someone to support you, to be with you, that you need nothing more. When I came on this road, I realized how much I needed them and how hard it was to continue to achieve the dream I had.

And your dream path was to be with your family?
It was more about being with my family. But when I think about it, it was because of them that I came and endured this difficult journey.

Can you tell us what your strengths were before you left home?
I was persistent, I was patient, I did not give up easily, I was not afraid.

Are you still like this and did you keep them?
Not as much as before. When I got here and saw the situation, a series of things happened; I realized that it has become harder for me to want to continue. I mean, I’m scared. In a new society, new people. It’s hard for me somehow, but I try my best to be able to do what I have to do.

Do you think that the difficulties you faced caused you to mature or that they created a positive point inside you?
I feel that it has led to my growth a lot. To learn that even in difficult situations I have to be able to control myself and carry on with what needs to be done.

Now that you are here, what is your dream and what is your hope for the future? Start with the phrase, “This is my dream.”
Again, my dream is to become a fashion designer. But sometimes it is difficult to see people in such difficult conditions as living in Moria; I wonder what is the value of clothes. Or show. Or a fashion show. With all this pain. With all the grief that people have. Then I say maybe I can show the world with this work that there are a lot of people who live like this. They are fighting for their dreams. They were forced to abandon their families.

Thank you very much for answering my questions. My questions are over. If you want to add something to show people in Europe to help them better understand the living conditions of immigrants here, you can say so.
I do not know whether our words can make them understand how much we have suffered and why we came. Because they will never go through what we have. Also that we came just for our dreams, for a better life. For a better life, for our children, for a better future, for our country.

Thank you.